Tiny-Small is getting less tiny small

Today I had to pay the next month’s rent. That means we have been in this new house for a month… where does the time get to?
We had another crazy busy couple of days which ended with us flopping into bed on Sunday night and declaring to one another that we had a good weekend. Saturday we attended Tiny-Small’s first birthday. There were thousands of people there and a cake that looked like a train and balloons and gifts and fairy bread! Tiny-Small seemed to appreciate the cards more than the gifts themselves – I wonder how long that will last? Not only did we attend the party but I drove us there. That’s a lot of driving down unfamiliar routes and through parts of town that were chock full of traffic. On the way there I did ok – only scaring Big-P just a little bit twice. I got to the party and had to sit in a corner, exhausted, for a couple of hours. After I felt a wee bit better, we sang happy birthday and then we set off again and I discovered that driving when one is feeling tired and incredibly vague can be a dangerous thing. I scared Big-P a little bit twice and I scared both of us a large bit twice as well. I didn’t actually hit anything but I came awfully close.

yai ai ai!!

I had to keep saying in an outraged voice “How is it that people like me can get their license?!”. Big-P thinks I am being awfully hard on myself and he probably got tired of hearing me moan about being a terrible driver for the rest of the weekend, but there should be some other plate that gets put on the car after obtaining a license. When you are learning you get an L-plate which basically says “stay out of my way, I am likely to be erratic and dangerous” but then as soon as you get your license you get a p-plate which stays on your car for three years and says something like “get out of my way, I am an 18 year old male and I drive like a freaking maniac”. There should be a plate that says “I have just got my license, and that was by the skin of my teeth, so you should stay well back, and do NOT under any circumstances sit in a lane beside me because the concept of sticking to my lane is still beyond me”.

But I didn’t do too badly really. I just have a lot to keep learning.

Sunday consisted of cleaning, cooking and caulking. Big-P has filled every single tiny gap in the kitchen with poly filler in hopes of keeping the hoards of ants at bay. And he cooked bread again – this time with olives in it. It’s true love, baby.

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30 Responses

  1. sfg@peak.org says:

    You know, I wish they did that (L, P) here in the US. You get your license — there’s no way to tell by the car or the license plates that the person next to you is someone who just came out of the test not 10 minutes prior.
    Aside, when I was in England in ’94 we all had a good giggle when we saw a tank with an L on it…

  2. twiglet@pretzel.com says:

    Wow, we have nothing so complex as a system of graduated learning license plates here in Canada (although I really think it’s a great idea). As for me, I failed my test on a Saturday and passed the next day. But I know exactly what you mean–the day after I was so nervous. “How could they have licensed me? I don’t know what I’m doing at all!”
    Anyway, long story short, I faked my way through a year of driving and now I’m doing all right. Highlight learning moment: turning left on a red light into a one way street (with me driving the wrong way). Love your illustrations, btw, which was what I was originally going to say when I fired up these comments and got far too verbose!

  3. Rest assured, there are worse drivers than you. My sister has her gold licence but still drives ‘pass-the-pizza-style’ which entails holding the wheel like when kids pretend to drive with a plate. Luckily the car is outfitted with a hand bar at the front passenger seat, which was intended more for off-road rough driving but in this case is perfect for short suburban trips with my sis behind the wheel.Love your blog by the way, and I really enjoy reading about your mini adventures….pics included.

  4. In NSW we have the red ‘P’ plates (in which the background is white and the ‘P’ is red), and then after a year you do another test and go onto green P’s (where, suprisingly, the P is green). I guess that’s a good indicator of how good a driver you’re expected to be.

  5. My husband and I are able to judge driving skills based solely on bumper stickers. If someone drives around with a “Backstreet Boys R Back” or “Britney Spears Rocks the House” sticker, we proceed with an ultimate level of caution. However, if someone proudly displays a “My child is an honor student at Lindbergh school” sticker, we feel quite safe.

  6. loobylu – rest assured you are not the worst driver out there, by far…i too got my license by the skin of my teeth (third time!) and that was only after I had three prayer groups praying to three different Almighty Powers for me (and that was not at my request, mind – THEY actually thought I needed that much help.) They ended up being right – I ignored a yield sign and almost hit another car on my test and they STILL passed me – all that praying must have worked. Now, a few years later, I have definitely improved and am not (as much) of a danger to myself and others…no matter what my trusty boyfriend says. And I am certainly much more comfortable on the road…Crappy drivers UNITE!

  7. melaniewilson@sympatico.ca says:

    Keep the faith, looby-lu! It gets easier. In fact, after 15 years on the road, I am happy to report that I have finally achieved sufficent skill that my mother (never a great traveller, to be fair) actually has enough confidence in my driving skill that she doesn’t feel the need to brace herself against the dashboard, teeth gritted and knuckles white, BEFORE I put the keys in the ignition. How’s that for progress?!

  8. 4d3fe8cf009812a705faa28594d15147@orangatango.com says:

    Hey Loobylu, you’ve learned to drive, and secured a license… why not just rest on your laurels? If driving is such a palavar, don’t drive. I’ll think your cool no matter what.
    And what is “corking”? Is it what folks up here call caulking (glubbing silicon paste into cracks around windows and the like)?

  9. Everyone drives horribly at first – it just takes practice.
    The first time I drove on a highway, I was passed by a car full of nuns because I was driving so slow. I still get teased about that one 🙂 but now I’m confident enough to drive in NYC during rush hour!

  10. I had a friend who once said to me, “If I had a quarter for every time I took my driver’s test….” (he stopped and thought about it) “…I’d have $1.25!” So he took the test 5 times before he passed it!
    Congratulations on passing your test, and relax! You’ll get better the more you get used to it. Maybe you need a good relaxing mix tape of driving tunes. <3

  11. vis10n – yes! I think I do mean caulking and I will change my spelling mistake accordingly. It’s sometimes hard to understand Big-P’s Canadian accent.
    Thanks for all the encouraging driving words and stories… I am driving to the doctor’s this morning with my mum so I hope I don’t scare her too much.

  12. Driving is evil. Plain and Simple.

  13. e@e.com says:

    OOh Big P cooking makes me miss my boy – he used to cook the most amazing ANZAC cookies. Awww.

  14. I think I am confused about how the license plate deal works. What if you are using an experienced drivers’ car? Do you change license plates?
    I just got the brandishing red “UNDER 21” taken off my license. Wohoo.

    I am a two-time test taker, I failed the first time from being so nervous I ignored a red light! d’oh! People still make fun of my poor driving skills.

    Love your site by the way! 🙂

  15. yup like other people said, you’ll get better. Unless you’re like my friend’s mom, who after years of driving experience still takes 15 mintues to park. Don’t worry.. =)

  16. 4d3fe8cf009812a705faa28594d15147@orangatango.com says:

    Thanks for the clarification… I’m always game to learn new words, so I was curious.
    Anyway, good luck with driving, it really does get much easier… but like I said earlier, don’t fret so… whether you drive or not, you’re still the cat’s pajamas to everyone around here!

  17. 4d3fe8cf009812a705faa28594d15147@orangatango.com says:


  18. It takes most of your first year driving to actually learn to drive, I think.
    Ant plagues are awful. I used to get them bad. Baygone surface spray is the best thing ever and those barrier sprays are good too. I hate ants.

  19. If you have trouble understanding Big-P’s accent, then I am your poetic revenge.
    I worked with a bunch of Aussies at a ski hill here in Canada – almost a decade ago now – and I still say “no worries” all the time. It’s an infernal linguistic parasite!

  20. unlacedsneakers@aol.com says:

    if you can see where ants are coming in, sprinkle talcum powder across where they have to walk. for some reason, ants can’t walk across talcum powder. sounds weird, but it works.

  21. for those confused about the Australian drivers license system, when you’re on your probationary license, which lasts for three years in most states, you have to display a ‘P’ plate in the back and front windows of your car. You can transfer them easily from vehicle to vehicle.

  22. I love your drawings! I stared at this one for a while before I figured out what bugged me… you’re on the wrong side! Hehe, silly American that I am.

  23. oh, i LOVE olive bread! you must post the recipe (if you can let go!). i currently go to Gluttony for my heavenly fix of olivey goodness. mmmmmmmmm.

  24. What’s fairy bread? Inquiring Canadians want to know.

  25. How sad to not know fairy bread. That’s white bread with margarine and hundreds and thousands on top. I don’t know if they’re called hundreds and thousands over there though…
    I think all states should have the green P plates, they make a lot of sense.

  26. Don’t do the talculm powder thing for ants. What it does is get into their leg joints so their legs fall off. As much as I hate ants, I couldn’t do that. Better a fast death than a slow painful one.

  27. brynne105@hotmail.com says:

    translation:hundreds and thousands = sprinkles

  28. Kathryn and Ryan — Oooo – ants and talcum powder sound like a gruesome mix – I think I will avoid that one. The caulking seems to have done wonders – I have only spotted 2 ants in the last week.
    Momo – P just uses the bread recipe out of the Moosewood cook book and then added a jar of drained kalamata olives. Very easy (apart from all the kneading)

    Row – we used to have different coloured P-plates for the first year but for some reason they abolished it. Not sure why.

  29. But, but, here hundreds and thousands and sprinkles are different things! Darn these cultural differences! 😀

  30. melaniewilson@sympatico.ca says:

    Food sounds like so much more fun down there! I love the term “hundreds and thousands”. How lovely! And fairy bread sounds yum too.